


Thawing the Ice - JARVIS

by Oudemia



Series: Who Holds the Devil [11]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Arguing, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Engagement, Friendship, Hurt Loki, Hurt Tony, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Male-Female Friendship, Misunderstandings, Natasha's fine though, Relationship Advice, and so's JARVIS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-04
Updated: 2015-04-04
Packaged: 2018-03-21 07:01:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3682470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oudemia/pseuds/Oudemia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony is still dying to know what happened to make JARVIS accept Loki into their lives, but neither of them wants to tell him about it. Luckily it turns out that Natasha has a fairly lax attitude toward keeping secrets, for a spy.</p>
<p>This is set post-engagement, but the flashback takes place between the Steve and Bruce chapters of 'Thawing the Ice'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thawing the Ice - JARVIS

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JARVIP (kacikaci)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kacikaci/gifts).



> Thanks to everyone who has left a comment or kudos - I really love you guys! 
> 
> And thank you to kacikaci, to whom I'm gifting this fic, for coming up with the original premise (despite claiming to have no memory of that!) and for several lovely details. 
> 
>  
> 
> DISCLAIMER, FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH: Marvel own all these characters, not me.

THAWING THE ICE - JARVIS

 

 

 

'Of course I trust him, I'm marrying him, aren't I?'

 

Natasha shrugs, her red curls bouncing on her shoulders. 'That doesn't necessarily mean...'

 

She trails off and Tony gives her a disbelieving look as he shuts the small refrigerator he keeps in the workshop. 'You superspy types have some strange ideas. Call me old-fashioned, but if I'm marrying someone, I like to be able to trust them, at least as far as I can throw them (which is not nearly as far as he can throw me, if I remember right). Yes, I trust him, and anyway, it's not like Loki's actually lying about this - he just refuses point blank to tell me about it. Which is a kind of honesty, I guess, but still, it's _killing_ me. Something important happened between the two of them and neither of them will tell me what it was.'

 

'Really, JARVIS won't tell you either?' Nat asks curiously.

 

Tony sighs, flopping down on the couch beside her and handing her her drink. 'No, and that's the _really_ weird part. He shouldn't have any secrets from me - I didn't even know that he _could_. Loki must have put some kind of...' he waves his hand around vaguely, 'magicky thing on him. Which is not cool, by the way - he really messed up my TV by putting a spell on it, so I don't even want to think what he could do to old J. Magic and technology - never a good mix.'

 

Natasha puts her feet up on the table and tips her chair back thoughtfully. Clearly this is going to be a long evening, and secretly she's delighted. People never come to her with relationship difficulties - well, ok, almost never, this is only the second time it's happened - and she's relishing the temporary feeling of normalcy. Like they're just two friends hanging out and discussing boys, nothing more. As complex as the issue is, at this moment things feel wonderfully simple.

 

'I think the problem here,' she says, having little or no idea if she's on the right track, 'is that you want it all. Which is not surprising because you're used to getting it all.'

 

Tony nods in agreement. 'It's true, I am.'

 

'Don't interrupt,' she admonishes him. 'You asked for my advice and you're getting it. You're expecting too much of Loki. You want him to be edgy and exciting and unpredictable, but you also want him to be completely open and honest with you. It isn't fair on him. People are allowed to have secrets, you know, even in a relationship.'

 

'I _know_ that.' Tony protests. 'But...'

 

She holds up a hand to silence him, and amazingly, it works. 'No buts. Think about it - he spent months believing he had to lie just to stay alive, plus now he's a spy, so basically a professional liar. He's always going to have secrets from you, and you have to be ok with that.'

 

'The thing is, Nat, I've thought about this, and I _am_ ok with it. Usually I wouldn't mind at all, it's just...'

 

'...because it's JARVIS,' she realises just in time to finish his sentence. 'He was the one thing that was all yours, and now you're jealous because he isn't, is that it?'

 

Tony looks crestfallen, like a little boy caught out in a mischief. 'Does that make me a bad boyfriend?'

 

She can't resist. 'Sweetie, there are a hundred other things that make you a bad boyfriend, I wouldn't worry too much about this one. Anyway, don't you think it's kind of sweet that JARVIS is being so loyal to Loki?' 

 

'But he's supposed to be loyal to me first!' Tony looks more wretched than ever, and she takes pity on him at last. 'Do you really think you're not going to be able to get past this?'

 

'I've tried,' Tony says miserably. 'I guess I'm just not that big a person. I'm tiny, as it turns out. You could literally squish me with your pinkie.'

 

Enough of this. Natasha drops her feet to the floor with a crash and Tony looks up, startled, as she says decisively, 'Right. Then I hope you appreciate what I'm about to do for you - I'm breaking a promise to the God of Lies and I don't even know what the repercussions of that are. If it comes back to bite me on the ass, I'm leaving you to deal with it - you won't see me for dust, understood?'

 

'Understood,' Tony agrees happily, 'I knew I should have asked you sooner. Seriously, is there anything you don't know?'

 

'I don't know how the last season of 'The Walking Dead' ends and I know you're the Spoiler King, but ruin that for me and I will punch you in the throat, I swear to god.' She glares at Tony, in case he's under the impression that she's in any way joking. 'So, this was, I guess, about two weeks after the bridge. Loki had moved in with you after the prisoner exchange with Hydra, and I know things were pretty tense between you guys for a while. He was on an emotional hair trigger, and you weren't used to tiptoeing round someone (usually the other way round, right?) so it didn't take much to set things off. But there's something you don't know. I got some of this from Loki, some from JARVIS, and you're going to have to fill in the gaps for yourself. So,' she takes a deep breath and a sip of her drink. 'Here's how it went down...'

 

 

*****

 

**_~ Six weeks earlier ~_ **

 

 

JARVIS isn't exactly unfriendly to Loki. On the contrary, he's polite, helpful and attentive, and makes sure the god has everything he needs during his stay in Stark Tower. Loki doesn't ask for much, but the AI is adept at anticipating his needs; he is often ready with a suggestion for some reading material when Loki can't sleep, and he is always happy to keep an eye on the god when Tony has to go out. (After his capture by Hydra, Loki has requested supervision at all times, and nobody's arguing with that.) It's not even that JARVIS is aloof - well, more than usually aloof anyway - it's just that his dealings with Loki lack that particular brand of affectionate sarcasm which means that he's come to accept someone into the fold. Tony has told him countless times to refer to their guest as Loki, but JARVIS insists on the more formal 'Mr Odinson', although never in Loki's presence. Then it's just 'Sir'. 'Would Sir care for an aperitif?' or 'Perhaps Sir would be interested in this article I found on the ancient Icelandic literary tradition' or 'Wake up, Sir, I believe you are experiencing another nightmare.'

 

And if Loki notices, he doesn't say anything. Why would he notice? Why would he assume that JARVIS is anything more than just the sum of his computerized parts?

 

But when JARVIS wakes Loki up in the middle of the night by calling his name with a note of panic in his voice, Loki shoots upright, his eyes instantly wide and alert.

 

' _Tony_?'

 

'Please Sir,' begs the AI. 'You have to hurry. Mr Stark is upstairs and he needs help.'

 

JARVIS sounds really worried, and not in a restrained British way, like the guests are about to arrive and the teapot hasn't been properly warmed yet. This is genuine anxiety and it galvanises Loki - the god grabs a silk robe from a chair and pulls it on over his pyjama bottoms. 'Show me,' he orders, before vanishing and reappearing instantly upstairs.

 

Tony is slumped on the floor by the foot of the couch, wearing the MARK XLII suit. His gloved hand is clenched above his heart, and he isn't moving. With a cry, Loki drops to his knees beside him, tearing off the visor and putting his ear to Tony's pale lips. 'What is this?' he mutters to himself, taking in the greyness of Tony's complexion, and lifting his eyelid to peer into unresponsive pupils. 'How is it...?' Suddenly he starts violently as if scalded, rocking back on his heels in shock.

 

'JARVIS, this is magic! What has happened to him. Where has he _been_??'

 

Caught between betraying his master and endangering him, JARVIS hesitates for a split second, but Loki snarls at him, his eyes blazing. 'He told me he was going to have a drink with Captain Rogers, and would be back late. Clearly he lied to me, and he has been on a mission. _I need to know where_. Tell me or he could die!'

 

That decides it, and JARVIS begins to speak in a voice with a hint of tremor in it. 'Mr Stark didn't want to worry you, Sir. He hasn't been sleeping well either and he thought that if he could...' The AI stops, not knowing how much to give away. 'He has felt so helpless, unable to protect you. He needed to do something, to take some form of revenge, and so...'

 

'He went back to the mountain,' breathes Loki, and JARVIS' silence tells him the rest. The god closes his eyes for a moment, his face white, and when he opens them again, his expression is grim but determined. 'I will be discussing that decision with Mr Stark later, but for now, we have work to do. How long ago was he affected?'

 

'43 minutes and 8.7 seconds, Sir. Something exploded out of the ground in front of him - some form of power we had not seen before - and I persuaded Mr Stark to return home. He seemed perfectly well until he arrived back at the Tower, and then he simply... collapsed.'

 

'Of course,' Loki mutters, slim fingers probing beneath Tony's jaw and his eyes glowing with a feverish brightness. 'The arc reactor kept him going, preserved his vital functions up till now - any other mortal would have been killed instantly.' As he talks, his fingers begin to trace complex patterns across Tony's skin and in the air around him. 'We know that Hydra scattered the mountain with traps. It seems that some of them contain an element of magic, perhaps a relic of their experiments with the Tesseract. This is a binding spell - my mother told me of them long ago, but I have never seen one in the flesh.'

 

'What is it doing to him?' JARVIS asks fearfully, and Loki finishes his elaborate ritual before answering. 'It is choking the life out of him. It has bound his limbs and his senses, and within minutes it will do the same to his heart and lungs. We do not have much time.'

 

He can almost feel JARVIS hovering anxiously behind him as the AI asks, 'Should I call for a doctor?'

 

Loki shakes his head without looking up. 'No. He does not need a doctor.'

 

'What does he need?'

 

'Me,' Loki replies flatly. He places his hands carefully on either side of Tony's face and murmurs something unintelligible, then with a curse in clear and modern English, he leans forward and presses his lips to Tony's. His fingers curl in Tony's hair, turning white at the knuckle, and as the color drains from his face, he begins to sag visibly against Tony's chest.

 

'Sir...'

 

Loki collapses backward, gasping, then he turns to one side and spits something blue and shimmering onto the floor. As it flickers and dies, he draws the back of his hand shakily across his mouth.

 

'Sir?' 

 

Loki raises a weary hand to silence him, and crawls forward to put his mouth over Tony's again. Again he reels back, coughing, and spits out a mouthful of the blue phosphorescence. He does this nine more times, his movements becoming weaker each time until eventually he just folds into a heap on the floor, shivering uncontrollably. His dark hair is plastered in wet strands across his face, and his shoulders are heaving with the effort of drawing breath. After a few moments, he raises his head weakly to look up at Tony, and seeing a healthy color returning to his cheeks at last, he lets his head drop back to the floor with a sob of relief.

 

'Sir?'

 

Loki sighs, and with slow painful movements, he pushes himself up onto his hands and knees. 'What is it, JARVIS?'

 

'Will he be alright?'

 

The AI's voice is so touchingly hopeful that Loki suppresses a smile, and he heaves himself to his feet. 'He will be fine, yes - he just needs to rest now. Do you think you can remove his suit?'

 

The metal plating peels itself away neatly from Tony's limbs and torso, and without the bulky armour, Loki is able to haul him up onto the couch with only a small amount of swearing. He positions Tony comfortably along its length with a cushion under his head, before sliding bonelessly to the floor in the spot where Tony had previously been sitting. His head lolls back next to Tony's and he just sits there, listening to the gentle but even sound of Tony's breathing.

 

About five minutes pass before he speaks again.

 

'JARVIS? Are you there?'

 

'Always, Sir. What can I do?'

 

'I know you have no secrets from Mr Stark, but I would really rather you didn't tell him what I just did. Sometimes I think he disapproves of my magic, and it might alarm him.'

 

'Mr Stark is hardly in a position to disapprove of anything. I will be glad to oblige, but, will he not remember these events himself?'

 

'I don't know,' Loki admits. 'Tomorrow will probably feel like the after-effects of a large drinking bout, and his memories of tonight will be hazy to say the least.'

 

'Familiar territory for Mr Stark, I regret to say.'

 

Loki smirks at that, and he rests his head back against the sofa again, the anxiety and the fear of the last hour combining with his magical exertions to take their toll on him. The exhaustion is profound, but so is the relief, and he feels oddly at peace sitting there with an unconscious man and an AI for company.

 

Suddenly JARVIS cuts in again, 'Sir, I have a question for you. I am uncomfortable with the familiarity of your given name but have as yet found no suitable alternative. What should I call you? Mr Odinson? Mr Laufeyson?'

 

'Neither would be right - I have no father. Not any more.' Loki doesn't sound bitter, only tired.

 

'Master Loki then?'

 

Loki thinks for a moment, and by his expression, the name seems to meet with his approval. 'Very well. And since we are talking openly, I also have a question for you. You do not like me, do you?'

 

'Sir, I am a computerised system. I was not designed to 'like' anyone.'

 

Loki stretches and yawns, 'Evasion is simply another way of lying, JARVIS - I should know.' There is a studied silence, and he sighs wearily. 'Let me put it another way then - You do not trust me.' This time it's a statement, not a question.

 

'Have you heard of the concept of emergent properties, Sir?' Loki shakes his head, and JARVIS goes on to explain. 'One of the ways in which I differ from an ordinary system is that I no longer have to rely on data supplied by others. The more I observe, the more my consciousness grows, and I can format new data based on what I have learnt. What I am trying to say is, I can change my mind.'

 

Loki smiles wanly. 'I see. So you're admitting you _didn't_ trust me then?'

 

'If you wish to look at it that way, then yes, I admit it, I didn't trust you. But I am beginning to.'

 

Loki nods his head slowly, his eyes drooping shut, and a hint of a smile on his lips.

 

But JARVIS isn't finished. 'I was concerned you might hurt him, even if you did not mean to.' His voice is soft, but Loki's eyes spring open again.

 

'I would die first,' he says fiercely. 'But not before killing everyone else who posed a threat to him.' Suddenly he sits up straighter as something occurs to him. 'You know, JARVIS, we could agree to help each other. I will vow to use every means in my power to protect Stark, and you promise to tell me when he plans to do something stupid and dangerous like he did tonight. Together, we have a better chance of keeping him safe. What do you say? Will you agree to a pact?'

 

'Were I endowed with hands, I would be shaking yours at this very moment, Sir.'

 

Grinning, Loki twists his head to look at Tony's sleeping features and an expression of bemused fondness comes over his face. 'May I tell you something else, JARVIS?'

 

'I would be honored if you would.'

 

'There is nothing I wouldn't do for this man. Despite his recklessness, his arrogance, his stubborn pride - everything that should exasperate me about him just makes me care for him all the more.'

 

'I believe it is called love, Sir. It is a phenomenon which has been observed once or twice over the years.'

 

'Funny, JARVIS. Still, it is very strange. He infuriates me again and again, I will _never_ understand him, and I will be forever cleaning up after his mistakes, and yet I cannot think of anything I would rather do.'

 

'It's odd, Sir, but that's exactly what he says about you.'

 

This time Loki laughs out loud, a happy sound despite the fatigue.

 

'Sir, if I may,' JARVIS suggests, 'you should also get to bed. Mr Stark's vitals are quite normal now and I will alert you if necessary.'

 

'Perhaps you are right.' Loki stands up, swaying, and has to catch his balance on the arm of the couch. He takes one final protective look at Tony, his eyes soft. 'Watch over him for me, JARVIS?'

 

'I will, and Master Loki?'

 

'Mmmm?'

 

'Thank you.'

 

Loki hesitates, a flash of something approaching panic on his features, but then he nods once, turns, and drags his tired footsteps toward the door.

 

 

*****

 

 

It certainly isn't the first time Tony has woken up on the couch, feeling as though someone has scooped out the contents of his skull and replaced them with red-hot ball bearings. But it's been a long time since he's felt quite this bad, and it seems to take him forever just to get himself into an upright position, while the journey downstairs to the bedroom is a painful, sweating ordeal. Finally he collapses onto the bed next to Loki's inert form, desperate for comfort, perhaps even a little sympathy for his sorry plight. Stripping down to his boxers, he crawls in between the sheets, slipping his arms around the god's waist and nuzzling the back of his neck. Despite feeling genuinely awful, the feel of Loki's skin against his, the clean smell of his hair, is enough to get him thinking libidinous thoughts and he nibbles playfully at the god's ear. But at that, Loki twists violently away, sliding right to the other side of the bed.

 

'Don't.'

 

'Don't what?' Tony asks innocently. 'Wasn't doing anything. Look, no hands.'Tony pulls his hands out from under the covers and wiggles them ostentatiously, while slyly reaching out to tickle the back of Loki's calf with his toes.

 

Loki flinches angrily. 'I said don't, Stark! I am not in the mood.'

 

'Neither am I, but it wouldn't take much to _get_ me in the mood. How about you?'

 

'Stop wilfully misunderstanding me! This is tiresome.'

 

Something is off here - Loki sounds really weird, even by his own skewed standards. He's been understandably moody since his capture, and has blown hot and cold on the subject of sex, but usually he's either distant or insatiable. Now he just seems _sulky_ , which isn't like him. 

 

'Something wrong, babe?'

 

At that, Loki turns on him with a look that reminds him instantly of Thor. All that righteous rage directed at him - he'd forgotten how scary it could be close up. As Loki sits up in bed, the sheet pooling around his waist, Tony tries desperately not to distracted by the smooth muscular planes of his bare chest. For the record, he thinks, it _is_ possible to be frightened and turned on at the same time. Meanwhile Loki looks so furious he's having trouble formulating words, but at last they burst out of him like a swarm of angry wasps, ' _Everything_ is wrong. Do not _dare_ to make light of last night! Do you not realise what could have happened?? I cannot endure to see you like that again - I _will not_!'

 

Woah. What?? Confused and confronted like that, Tony at once goes into defensive mode. He can't remember anything about last night if he's honest. The last thing he remembers is telling Loki that he was going out for a drink with Steve, so that's what must have happened. The guy can't get properly drunk, so Tony always ends up drinking for two (or at least that's his excuse). Yeah, it looks like things might have gotten messy, but hey, he's Tony Stark. People would be shocked if he _didn't_ go off the rails once in a while.

 

'Oh come on, what's the problem?' he protests, and Loki's hands curl into fists amidst the tangle of bedding.

 

'You _lied_ to me!'

 

Did he? He can't remember. Maybe he stayed out longer than he'd intended to, but so what? Tony suddenly feels aggrieved by all this. His head hurts badly now, he's tired and sick, and so what if he had a night out with the boys? This last couple of weeks have been hard on him too, and isn't he allowed to let off a little steam? Still, he realises how childish he sounds as he falls back on the obvious retort, _'I_ lied?? That's rich coming from you.'

 

Loki hisses like a wildcat. 'When did I last lie to you?'

 

'Well I don't know, do I?' Oh, this is ridiculous - even as he says the words, he knows he doesn't mean them, but Loki's eyes are flashing now, with anger, and also with hurt and betrayal.

 

'Do _not_ use that against me. I have been more honest with you than with anyone my entire life, and for _this_? You lied to me about where you were going, and the state in which you returned! I thought you were...' Loki goes pale, his face positively haunted, and Tony feels himself getting really annoyed. Talk about an over-reaction! All the things Loki must have seen, and done, and he's acting all shocked because his boyfriend had a few pints too many. What was the worst thing he could have done? Did he throw up in Loki's spiky helmet thing? 

 

'Jeez, get a sense of perspective!' he snaps, and Loki rears back as if struck, his lip curling.

 

'I have travelled between _worlds_. And you presume to accuse _me_ of a lack of perspective! You know nothing of the universe, or of me!!'

 

'Oh, get _over_ yourself! Just because you're pretty and from another planet, you think you can do and say whatever you want.' As upset and angry and miserable as he is, another part of Tony is just looking on, quietly aghast at what's happening. What is he _saying_? He feels Loki slipping away from him with every unkind word, and yet he can't seem to stop himself. It's as if a festering wound has opened and something bitter is pouring out.

 

Loki is looking more and more agitated, his hair and his eyes wild. Tony is briefly reminded of the way the god looked when they first faced each other in the Tower. And he remembers his own words later- ' _you looked...desperate. Like things had got out of hand and you didn't know how to stop it_.' Yes, that's exactly how he looks now, how they both look, probably. And still he pushes on, digging himself deeper and deeper into trouble. 'Last time I looked, you weren't the king of anywhere, so stop pretending you are.' 

 

A muscle twitches in Loki's jaw and he looks like he's barely holding it together as he says tightly, 'For all your cynicism, you can be such a child sometimes.'

 

His head pounding, Tony snaps, 'OK, I can't believe _you_ just said that to _me_. Are you seriously picturing yourself as the adult in this conversation?'

 

'Get out,' Loki hisses through his teeth. 'I have had enough of your insults.'

 

'That's what you think. And you know what else? You can't actually order me around because this is my place.' He can hear how petty he sounds but he doesn't care as he gets to his feet and yanks the sheet off the bed to wrap it haughtily around himself. 'But, whatever. I'm going anyway. I liked it better upstairs on the couch.'

 

Loki for once has no response. He is pale as a ghost and Tony feels a sharp pang of guilt, but he can't seem to back down, even now. He stumbles out, leaving the god shivering on the bed, and slams the door petulantly after him. Leaning against it for a moment, unable to comprehend what has just happened, he feels his headache kick in in full force and he groans quietly.

 

'J, remind me where I keep the Alka-Seltzers?'

 

'I am not your maid, Sir. I suggest that you find them yourself.' JARVIS's tone is icy, yet another thing Tony doesn't understand, and doesn't have the energy to think about. So, feeling worse about himself than he ever thought possible, he trudges wretchedly back upstairs, and curls up again on the couch, alone.

 

 

*****

 

 

'JARVIS said you were coming but he didn't give me a lot of warning so I don't have much to offer you. Glass of milk, perhaps?'

 

Natasha gestures Loki to a chair, and checks her fridge again, just in case. Yup, it's pitiful. She doesn't tend to stock up, just grabs something on the way home, and she very rarely has visitors. She takes out a carton of milk, finds two glasses and comes to sit beside her unexpected guest at the kitchen table. Loki is dressed casually, in black jeans and a grey hoodie, but he still manages to look elegant, as if he's about to perform a piano solo or something. When she opened the door to him, she'd had the strangest feeling, and she had to remind herself that it was vampires who can't cross your threshold uninvited, and not alien Norse demigods. She had of course invited him in anyway. 

 

She hasn't seen him since the Bus, shaking in Tony's arms while Steve ushered her away. He looks better, his cheekbones less sharp, his dark hair curling sleekly onto his shoulders, but there is a tautness to him still, and his eyes are restless. He needs help, and maybe she can give it to him. She's damn well going to try, at any rate.

 

Natasha doesn't do small talk, and she guesses that Loki doesn't either. 'I haven't thanked you for saving me, up on the mountain. I would have died if it wasn't for you.'

 

Loki looks genuinely startled, as if he had quite forgotten. 'That is not why I wished to talk to you.'

 

'Doesn't matter - I'm thanking you now. I owe you.'

 

He looks everywhere but at her, and his fingers pluck at an invisible thread on his sleeve. Wow, he _really_ doesn't take gratitude very well. That's not surprising, he's probably not used to deserving it, but it's strange to see him so discomfited. How much of his ease, his poise, his confidence, is just a facade, she wonders?

 

Finally he is able to look up and meet her gaze, and with his next words, he completely turns the tables - it's her turn to be startled now. 'Stark and I are having relationship difficulties and I need your advice.'

 

'Um. Yeah, that's not... I'm probably not the best person to ask about that.' And that's putting it mildly.

 

He leans forward, his hand touching hers. 'Please. You are the most honest person I have encountered here, and I realise the irony of that statement.' He looks quite forlorn now. 'I am at a loss. We argued, and I do not know how to make it better. At first I wasn't even sure I wanted to, but... now I am certain I want to make peace, and sadly that is not my area of expertise.'

 

She smiles, though she's fairly sure that wasn't a joke. 'OK, so fill me in. What happened?'

 

He tells her about Tony's trip to the mountain in search of revenge, about his close call, and Loki's use of magic to save him. The he tells her, shyly and reluctantly, about the argument, and when he's finished, Natasha raises an incredulous eyebrow. 'Is that all?? I was expecting so much worse - you should hear some of the things he did to Pepper. Look - this was clearly just a misunderstanding. He didn't remember what had happened to him, and he thought you were overreacting.'

 

'Yes, of course I realised that,' Loki says miserably. 'But by then it was too late. Things were said - cruel, spiteful things.'

 

'Yeah, well, I'm sure you've said worse.' Loki shoots Natasha a look and she meets his gaze steadfastly. She could give him a couple of good examples if needs be. 'Anyway, of course you argued!' she continues. 'Honestly, we've all been curious about how you two have managed not to kill each other. I mean, _look_ at the pair of you.'

 

'I am not sure I take your meaning.' Loki's voice is stiff and he narrows his green eyes at her.

 

She almost laughs in his face. How can he be this clever, and this naive at the same time? She _might_ actually be a relationship expert compared to him, and that's just too ridiculous. 'Oh come on! On paper, you two shouldn't work at all - you have _way_ too much in common.'

 

'Oh really? Such as?' Loki asks coldly.

 

Natasha pins him with a level stare. 'I'm just going to throw some words out there and you tell me if they remind you of anyone, okay? Incredibly smart, likes the sound of his own voice, arrogant, superior, selfish, ambitious to an insane degree, sensitive, manipulative, predatory, defensive, brave. No sense of self-preservation. Habitual loner. _Major_ father issues. Want me to stop yet?'

 

'Actually, no, I am rather enjoying this.'

 

'OK, that isn't healthy. Stopping now.But you get my point, right? You're both amazingly high maintenance, and you're both used to being the diva in any given situation. By rights your relationship ought to be nothing but drama, a non-stop screaming match, but somehow you manage to pull it off, most of the time. So clearly you've been doing something right up until now. What was it?'

 

Loki goes quiet for a long time and she watches, fascinated, as he casts his mind back and the dark clouds just fall away. His face is positively radiant as he says softly, 'I spent each moment thinking how lucky I was.'

 

'Then go back to doing that. Chances are, Tony's already doing the same thing. People argue, it doesn't always have to mean something, and if you guys love each other as much as you seem to, then you'll make it work.'

 

Finally he lets himself look hopeful, as though he had not actually been expecting anything up until now. 'Thank you, I was not sure if you would want to help.'

 

She shrugs. 'Why wouldn't I? You make Tony happy and that's all I care about. Besides, I don't like to see my friends fighting.' 

 

Loki almost flinches at that, and he looks terribly young and exposed as he mutters, 'I cannot yet believe that you would count me as a friend.'

 

'Hah - you opened a portal to another world and led an army of giant killer space whales against New York, and _that_ weirds you out?' She smiles, not unaffectionately. 'You're a peculiar guy, Loki.'

 

It's true, he isn't like other people, and something else occurs to her then, something he may not have realised yet, himself. 'You know, I understand why you got so angry at Tony. This was the first time you saw him really hurt, and you panicked. To care for someone so much more vulnerable than yourself - it's a new experience for you. No wonder you were scared.'

 

'I was not scared, I...'Loki's eyes narrow and widen again, and he breathes a soft 'oh'. Yup, totally naive. 

 

'I have to get back - I have to talk to him,' he says urgently, standing up so fast that she finds herself on her feet too, her instincts kicking in before she can stop them. Loki takes her hand and presses it between both of his. 'Yet again, you have shown me the right path, and I am grateful to you. But I would ask one more favor - please do not tell Tony that I used magic to heal him.'

 

'Why not?'

 

Loki looks vaguely confused. 'I... do not know. I just do not wish him to know about it.'

 

'Because you can't deal with people being grateful to you for saving their lives? Well, you'd better get used to it, pal.' 

 

He looks more confused than ever, and Natasha shakes her head in exasperation. If these two make it past the first year, it'll be a goddamn miracle. And for her part, she fervently hopes that they get one.

 

 

 

*****

 

 

'I am relieved to see you, Master Loki!' 

 

'Gods, what has he done this time?' Loki strides toward the elevator, and JARVIS hurries to reassure him. 'I did not mean to alarm you, it's just that Mr Stark hasn't been himself all day. He won't talk to me, he hasn't eaten - I don't know what to do. He's in the penthouse - will you go to him?'

 

'Odin himself could not prevent me. And JARVIS?'

 

'Sir?'

 

'Can you make sure there are no interruptions for the next hour or so? Mr Stark and I need some time alone.'

 

'I will see to it - good luck, Master Loki.'

 

When Loki reaches the penthouse, Tony is sitting in the dark staring out of the window, and his breath catches in his throat as the god comes to stand behind him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

 

'I wasn't sure you were coming back,' Tony says quietly, and Loki answers him with a fond smile in his voice. 'Where else would I go?'

 

Home, Tony thinks, but he doesn't say it out loud. He can't bear to remind Loki that the god has his own apartment, that his stay at Stark Tower is only temporary. Because with all his heart, he doesn't want it to be. Instead, all the guilt and anxiety of the last few hours - no, the last few weeks - comes bursting out. 'God, Loki, I was such an asshole! I don't even remember everything I said, just that I wish I hadn't said it. All I wanted was to look after you, and instead I left you alone for a whole night, and the next morning I start acting like...' he drops his head into his hands with a groan.

 

Both of Loki's hands are now resting on Tony's shoulders and he kneads them reassuringly. 'I do not need looking after. And besides, I also said some things I did not mean. I was upset.'

 

_'Of course_ you were fucking upset - you're still only a couple of weeks away from having your mind scrubbed out by those Hydra dicks. I can't believe I was so insensitive. OK, I can, but that doesn't make it ok. It's just that... oh fuck it, you know I'm not good at introspection, but I've had time to think about this. I've been so scared and angry since I thought I'd lost you. It was the worst time of my life, and I mean that. I think I was even mad at you for letting yourself get captured, even though I know you did it for Nat. But I couldn't just talk to you about it like a normal person, so I let it build up and then I ended up taking it out on you, which is about the worst thing I could have done. I'm so sorry...'

 

'I have already forgiven you, my love.'

 

Loki leans over the back of the chair and kisses Tony's forehead. Tony reaches up and grabs the hand resting on his left shoulder, and holds onto it desperately. 'I don't deserve you.'

 

Loki laughs softly, but his voice is earnest as he replies, 'Perhaps not. But fortunately we do not always get what we deserve - else what would have become of me?'

 

Tony tugs suddenly on his hand, pulling Loki round in front of him until with a sharp yank, the god sprawls into his lap. Tony's arms go around him, and Loki makes a small contented humming sound as he leans in against Tony's chest, his hair tickling Tony's chin. The inventor is about to say something, but as Loki snuggles closer and all the tension drains from his tired body, he realises that at this moment, there is no need.

 

Having assured himself that all is now well, JARVIS shuts off the visual feed from the penthouse and turns his attentions elsewhere. Nothing short of a global catastrophe would induce him to interrupt them now, and even then, he would tactfully allow them a few moments. The masters must not be disturbed.

 

 

*****

 

Nat finishes her story and looks up at Tony. She's been so absorbed in the recounting of it that she hasn't really registered him in some time, so she's shocked by the look on his face. He has gone a distressing grey color and his eyes are haunted. He is positively awash with shame as he admits, 'I remember waking up with the hangover from hell, and I remember most of the argument and the making up. But the rest.... I am such a dick. Seriously. Why hasn't anyone put me out of my misery? And why does Loki put up with me?'

 

Natasha looks at him in astonishment. 'Really? After everything I just told you, you still need to ask?' She raises an eyebrow. 'JARVIS, I know you were listening in, by the way - the secret's out. Tony knows about your little bonding session with Loki. What were you both thinking, saving his life like that? You should be ashamed of yourselves.'

 

'Not helping, Nat. Give it a rest,' Tony moans. She grins unrepentantly at him, and he turns his attention to JARVIS. 'J, I'm really sorry. The pair of you look after me, and all I do is blunder about being paranoid and dickish. Friends?'

 

'Well obviously, Sir,' sighs JARVIS, but somehow Tony doesn't seem satisfied yet.

 

‘And I’m so proud of the way you’ve included Loki into our little set-up. My whole dumb jealousy thing aside, I thought you were amazing - you make us feel like a family, which is exactly what we’re going to be. So thanks for that.’

 

‘You’re welcome, Sir. That’s what I’m here for.’ 

 

'You know what, no, that's not good enough.' (Natasha's eyebrows go up. What is Tony about to do this time?) He gets up and starts pacing the room excitedly. 'That’s not _all_ that you’re here for, and I want to prove it to you. I was going to ask Rhodey, but he's still a bit shaky about the whole Loki situation, and then I thought of asking Bruce, but the poor guy doesn't need the stress, plus he'll only end up ruining an expensive tux. So the more I think about this, the more it makes perfect sense. You know me better than anyone, J, you'll have some really choice anecdotes for the speech, and I think you kind of _get_ Loki, which makes this so much better. What do you think?'

 

'Sir, as usual, you are not making a great deal of sense. Please clarify.'

 

Natasha rolls her eyes extravagantly, something she finds herself doing a lot lately. 'You, Tony, Loki - for three of the smartest guys on the planet, you can all be so unbelievably dumb sometimes. He's asking you to be his best man, you numbskull! Now say yes so we can start discussing Tony's bachelor party, and don't even _think_ about not inviting me because I'm a girl, okay? So, I’ve been thinking, and I’ve got a few ideas - there's this great bar in St Petersburg....'

 

 

 


End file.
